Sadly I don’t think it is going to net me a stunning Russian girl but having a positive mental attitude is still very important.. and in case you’re wondering what the hell I’m on about I’ll refer to you to Major Anya Amasova in that 1977 Bond flick the Spy Who Loved Me*… mmm…
Anyway, continuing the glamorous theme I was at the dentist on Monday. It was a beautiful day. I said to the
glamorous moderately attractive dentists assistant in that particularly British way, and sounding like a tw*t “oh what a spiffing day“. She looked at me and replied in an equally British manner “yeah but it’s gonna rain tomorrow innit..“. Looking on the negative side of life seems to be something of a British hobby that I have noticed more than ever since returning home, whether complaining about the government, or complaining about weather that hasn’t even happened yet… I didn’t mind the rain. I went out riding, it had been dry since I returned to the UK so the chance to have a proper wet ride was one I’d been looking forward to. Sort of. I shall explain. When the weather is sunny and I go riding it reminds me of nothing, I just enjoy riding in the sun. It is a wonderful thing. When it is wet and windy on the other hand I am always reminded of epic days out or terrific adventures, the kind of experiences that imprint themselves on your mind.. whether it’ a downpour on the Carretera Austral or the slogging through the snow on a Himalayan pass.. these memories are a good thing too.. therefore riding in the rain is a good thing. Towards the end of that ride the sun came out and I marvelled at how beautiful the reflection of blue sky is in a polished, high flange front track hub. I doubt I would have noticed had it not been wet and dark just a few minutes before. It’s all good, whatever happens being positive makes all the difference.
I do have a small complaint however. To the folk that do all the commercials on TV these days… based on the targeting of the commercials, it would appear that the average Brit suffers from white marks, yellow marks, incontinence, a stiff case of lift and drag, needs “life changing apps” on his/her smartphone and seeks solace in “luxury yoghurt”… life changing apps?! good grief… The nation needs to get a grip.. and get a life. I long for simpler and arguably cleverer days when you could turn on the telly and watch a cigar smoking man stick his fingers in a hole in a dyke.
I’m speaking of the wonderful Hamlet cigar ads of course, and one in particular featuring sea defences in the Netherlands. Shame on you if you thought otherwise. Banning tobacco advertising was a bad move, aside from loss of entertainment value and tax revenue from stopping people smoking it was another example of the nanny state thwarting Darwinism… along with trying to get stupid people to eat healthily so they don’t die off early. Oh well… ;-)
* the particular bit I’m on about is when Amasova is telling Bond about survival strategies she learned while at Badass Russian Agent school..
Amasova: That it’s very important to have a positive mental attitude.
Bond: Nothing more practical than that?
Amasova: Food is also very important.
Bond: Mm-hmm. What else?
Amasova: When necessary, shared bodily warmth.
Bond: That’s the part I like.
Yeah, bring on the shiny track hubs…
I feel I must point out that I am not a particular Bond geek, or even a fan but certain things stick in my mind. I can’t think why…